Necessarily Unnecessary

Blatherscopians, You know how I love me some random. Well, it doesn't get much randomier than this. Keep clicking for new useless facts--You'll be amazed at how much of this crap You may already know.

Spooky Goodness Headin' Your Way

It approacheth! The Medium opens Oct. 22nd, kids. This is gonna be one heck of show, 4-reals. I, who know this show like the back of my hand, was blown away by a rehearsal last week (2 weeks out from opening!). It is terrifying. Please come check us out!

It's the End of the World as We Know It

I always knew Science would usher in Apocalypse! You'd best kiss Your Loved Ones adieu--and hope that they really do Go With God.*

Seriously. Have You hugged YOUR Jesus today?

I know someone who has. She's my new BFF; after all, we're both Vagina Americans, aren't we? (Though not the first.) She's not a Pig**, but is a kind of Pitbull-Barracuda halfbreed***. I know that we're soul mates 'cuz we both think that no one can understand the Lord's Tongue. But what can ya do when the Spirit comes on You?****

*These religions are not approved: see ALL.
**Known for her intelligence.
***Known for her ferocity.
****That is some drrrty.

Can You Contain My Sexy Pulp?

Some things are always lost in translation.

Nobody Makes It Like Mama

From the awesome Fail Blog.

Wanna Take A Trip?

This is some Crazy, folks. The light's direction determines what You'll see.

Joss Is BAAAAACK....

For all you dear Blatherscopians who, like me, adore anything that comes out of the Jossverse, I am the herald of glad tidings! As we bemoan the passing of Buffy and Firefly, and eagerly await the new Dollhouse, Joss has given us a morsel of joy: Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog.

The Future Is...Past

Those Ancient Greeks are always blowin' my mind!

Ode To Joy

Meep.

Becoming A Seeing-Eye Person

This week, I learned that my beloved little dog, Tazar*, is blind. His vision had apparently been worsening, but so slowly that his knuckle-headed owners couldn't put two and two together until too late. In the past few months we noticed him moving slowly, playing less, snarling when our other dog surprise-pounced him, getting under foot more--but it wasn't until he started walking into walls that we thought there might be anything more than Old Age.

I feel horribly guilty. How could I have missed this?

*In full, he is Tazar The Beastmaster.

I'm Giving A Concert!

Come hear me sing some pretties Saturday, May 31 at 7pm at Oregon Culinary Institute (1701 SW Jefferson, Portland)! The event is a benefit for the American Cancer Society Relay For Life, so don't grimace at the $25 ticket price.

I'll be singing some of my favorite arias interspersed with some truly beautiful art song cycles, including the haunting "Bachianas Brasilieras No. 5." And, in case you haven't heard me in a while, I'm really frackin' good. [The sound of her own horn is heard blowing in the distance.]

Ticket sales have been sluggish (I can't believe my fame isn't enough to make people flock to me!), and there is the possibility of cancellation--10 more tickets need to be sold by end of day Monday, May 26. So call! The event organizers can be reached at 503-365-7390.

Tuesdays With Zerd...And "A.I."

Um, have I mentioned how into "American Idol" I've gotten this season? Yup. Totally, nerdily into AI. I like to analyze the singing, the performances, the value of the judges criticisms. But I have never voted. Until tonight.

So, tonight was the final--David Cook vs. David Archuleta. DA is a sweet boy with a sweet voice, but he is not an entertaining or versatile performer; he has a syrupy, old-fashioned taste in music with earnest (sometimes awkward) lyrics. DC, whose vocal timbre is not as immediately beautiful as DA's, has faaaaar more range. DC has some serious musical chops! The boy has a great ear for arrangements that pull You in, in spite of Yourself. DC has stretched himself vocally, musically, and stylistically in ways that DA has not.

But DA, a cutie, nice-boy, 17-year-old, has the teenie-bopper craze going on in a big way.

So I decided to stand up for musical integrity. I have spent the past 3 hours dialing and redialing, voting for DC. I have the phone on my shoulder as I type this. Most of the time I get a busy signal, but I have still managed to log over 60 votes. The AI phone lines close in an hour....

Why I Am So Lame--And Other Interesting Stories For Curious Boys And Girls

The blogging has been lax. I bet one or two of you has noticed this. I have stored up some blog-worthy thoughts, but have been a titch preoccupado. You see, this is now my universe.* I ascended the throne about a month ago, and that throne is sitting on a mountain of hard work that needs a-doin'. I am trying to establish a rhythm that takes less than 12 hours a day, but so far have failed. Wish me luck!

*Does it thrill You the same way it thrills me to see MY name in the "About Us" section? It kinda does, I know; it's OK to admit it.

This Is Some Inspiring Inspiration, Fellow Artists

Ach, I am a softy for stories like this. It helps make me feel like I'm not old as Methuselah, like I haven't already missed the boat to Shangri-La.

Et tu, Luciano?

As if Ashley Simpson hadn't betrayed us enough*, this has just come to light about Pavarotti.

I, for one, am disgusted. Live performance is about The Moment, not pre-recorded perfection! If he wasn't up to it, someone else would have been. The recording industry has done wonders for Historical Preservation--but it is hampering the natural evolution of Serious (aka "Classical") Music to a point of paralysis.

Fuck it.

*Just by attempting to "sing" in the first place.