Writing For Your Life

A recent study confirmed what We All Knew: gender bias is alive and well in the theatre. However, its most surprising find was the way in which women ADs and agents review the work of women playwrights.

I do not subscribe to beliefs about women's catty behavior to other women. Instead, I wonder about women's protectiveness in the face of norms. Men are still the assumed baseline of civilization; their works are supposedly normative. Women, however, are always Representing Their Gender, rather than an individual view of the world. To find any foothold, the woman writer must be exemplary, not opening the door to criticisms of a woman's inability to write/be funny/command character/etc. Other women professionals are the gatekeepers of excellence; they can't take the chance that their position will be jeopardized by one bad apple.

But perhaps that failsafe has become more of a hindrance than help. Perhaps it is time to trust that others (particularly the males of our species) will not embrace or dismiss a work due to genitalia. Perhaps it is time to quite chaperoning one another. Perhaps it is time to believe in each other, as humans.

I'm Afraid Of Americans

...As Bowie says.

Well, he didn't win. It sounds so silly, but I feel tired in a way that makes my bones ache. That kind of talent was not enough for people. He didn't fit masculine norms, hetero norms, or Protestant norms.

He was just another Glam-rock gay Jew in eyeliner.

What stuns me is the role that Evangelical Christians played in this debacle. The 3rd Place Contestant's pastor tweeted, "Everyone who voted for @dannygokey should vote for Kris Allen! We need a believer to represent! Kris is an awesome young man from a great…"

And so "Christians" did.

It didn't matter that their new Champ's musical talents lie more in producing than performing; what mattered was that a Christian win. Because, apparently, God is not glorified when someone who's not a Christian attains any sort of influential position in this world, deserved or not.

As if the Creator was not in every aspect of Beauty in this world.

Rock the Vote

In an age of wussy "singing", one man stands ready to sing with good technique, breath support & control, and mad range manipulation. That man is Adam Lambert. Vote!

*The above is a totally cheesy musical of the Ten Commandments (with Val Kilmer, no less!), but Adam rocks it anyway. The vocal pyrotechnics start about 2:45 into it, fyi.

Make-Up My Day

The other day I was leaving my coffeehouse, perked up by another perfect latte, and walking with a bit of a bounce to my step. An unshaven transvestite past me on the street and exclaimed, "Oh! Honey! You are so beautiful!" How could I keep from grinning after that?

Flushing With Pleasure

I am just returned from Californ-I-A. I drove my trip, stopping now and again at various rest stops for various kinds of rest. Something grabbed my attention on the journey: the many ways to flush a toilet. Yes, yes; I appreciated the glorious green trees, the mountains' majesty, the rolling plains...but my thoughts stayed with the toilet.

You can flush a toilet by: pulling a cord from the ceiling, jiggling the tank handle, flashing your nude butt in front of a motion sensor, pressing a button on the tank lid, pressing a button on the back wall, stepping on a lever, and lowering the seat cover.

G*d bless America.

Passionate About "Meh"

I effing hate this word.

How was this milquetoast sound ever elevated to Word-Status? Is it because the majority of the population can spell it correctly--on first try!--or perhaps it is another causality* of Texting?

*For some reason, I picture cops staring sadly down at the tiny chalk outline of an Alphabet.

HAND-some Is As Handsome Does

I was puttin' along in Old Town today, when what did my little eye spy? That's right, a giant frackin' hand stemming from the bowels of a parking lot. Who knows why--it's Portland.

Just one of the many things that make me love this town.

Spring Means New Beginnings

Hello, faithful Blatherscopians. After a year in which I felt like I was enacting a country song, I have safely emerged on the Other Side. During the past year, You may have noticed a distinct lack of the post-age; this lack was due to my upbringing: I had nothing nice to say, so I didn't say anything at all.

And I have delayed restarting the blog-alation due to embarrassment--kinda like the friend you really like, promise to "get together with", delay and delay, and then feel like too much time has gone by to be anything but insulting and decide it is better just to let them fade away. But I don't want You to fade, fade away! So here am I, hurdling my natural reticence, startin' fresh.

Year-of-our-Lord 2009, so far, kicks DONKEY! I will be unleashing the Ramble over the next few days--prepare Thyselves.

Indecent Proposal: VIII

The passing of Prop 8 (among many other despicable state amendments across the U.S.) in "liberal" California was...well, there aren't really words for it. Thankfully, it makes a Dante's Inferno of a musical.

Necessarily Unnecessary

Blatherscopians, You know how I love me some random. Well, it doesn't get much randomier than this. Keep clicking for new useless facts--You'll be amazed at how much of this crap You may already know.

Spooky Goodness Headin' Your Way

It approacheth! The Medium opens Oct. 22nd, kids. This is gonna be one heck of show, 4-reals. I, who know this show like the back of my hand, was blown away by a rehearsal last week (2 weeks out from opening!). It is terrifying. Please come check us out!

It's the End of the World as We Know It

I always knew Science would usher in Apocalypse! You'd best kiss Your Loved Ones adieu--and hope that they really do Go With God.*

Seriously. Have You hugged YOUR Jesus today?

I know someone who has. She's my new BFF; after all, we're both Vagina Americans, aren't we? (Though not the first.) She's not a Pig**, but is a kind of Pitbull-Barracuda halfbreed***. I know that we're soul mates 'cuz we both think that no one can understand the Lord's Tongue. But what can ya do when the Spirit comes on You?****

*These religions are not approved: see ALL.
**Known for her intelligence.
***Known for her ferocity.
****That is some drrrty.

Can You Contain My Sexy Pulp?

Some things are always lost in translation.

Nobody Makes It Like Mama

From the awesome Fail Blog.

Wanna Take A Trip?

This is some Crazy, folks. The light's direction determines what You'll see.